I made a very conscious decision recently to do everything I possibly can to live the life that I've envisioned for myself. At twenty six I felt a bit like I was losing myself. Life felt like it was in a bit of a lull. I don't want to say that some of my best days are coming to an end because I think my whole life will be great, just in very different ways. As I approach twenty seven I do feel a bit like my days of being selfish + careless are getting a bit limited though. And I mean selfish + careless as positives here.
I don't feel old though. Some people think twenty seven + freak out. I actually think it is a perfect age. I think back to twenty three + all that comes to mind is money problems, career insecurities, parting ways with friends that no longer fit into your life. That's not totally true, but I feel much more secure + sure of myself than I did back then. I like me. I even have a little bit of disposable income these days. Life is pretty good.
I still want it to be better though which is why my new goal is:
I've never been much of an aggressive person + it has worked out okay for me. I'm finding more + more though that you're only going to get the things you want if you make a conscious effort + put yourself out there. Hence, less fear. So yeah, I'm giving that a try. I think the fun part just comes naturally as a result of having less fear. So far it has worked out that way at least.
Thanks so much to everyone that wished me a happy birthday. I spent the day sleeping in, buying myself a few presents, discovering some new music, + enjoying dinner + drinks with my brother, his wife, + my very soon to be niece (two more weeks!). I also felt very loved from all of you which means so much. You guys are amazing + I have a feeling many of your will help me achieve this more fun, less fear goal this year.